It is ok to not be happy

Modern positive psychology would have tricked us into believing that our natural and default state is one of happiness, filled with rainbows and butterflies, and where we will all live happily ever after.

That has made us gone on an unceasing and relentless, and more devastatingly, doomed-to-fail, chase for happiness. So much so that in this pursuit of that state, we wear ourselves out, burn ourselves up and make us even more unhappy than ever.

I recalled passing a comment that almost got me an rousing round of applause, ok I jest, it was just to an audience of one, that “happiness is overrated”.

And indeed it is. What is happiness? And why are human beings conditioned to hunt it down, thinking it’s a constant perpetual natural state that we should be in?

Life, in its organic state, wouldn’t equate to a constant experience of pleasurable moments does it? Is happiness equivalent to pleasure? Or does it connote more?

Happiness I think, would be like bursts of fireworks, temporary and fleeting. Instead, I think maybe what we should be trying to achieve, would a state of being at peace with our lives, as they pan out day after day, being mindful and present in each moment, accepting that pain and unpleasantness are just as much a part of life as happiness and enjoyment could be.

That’s why life is a journey and a ride isn’t it? It is ok that that we don’t feel happy all the time, and there isn’t a need to keep trying to chase after the feeling of being happy because we would only be setting ourselves up for failure, going on a “wild, goose chase”.

Currently reading a book called “The Happiness Trap” which discusses the acceptance and commitment theory (ACT), or therapy; basically telling us to accept painful and uncomfortable feelings and thoughts into our lives, as well as the ‘how’.

I certainly hope it’ll shed some new light to me in how I can better deal with life as it is.

I’m craving for a break. But I’m clueless as to where I should or could head to.

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